I think they call it "in limbo". In my case, it's a happy limbo. The uncertainty is still there but for some reason I feel calm. Some people have been talking about taking time while others are pressuring you to take the next step. I'm okay where I am, and when I say that, I'm really sincere that I'm okay where I am.
Things falling in to place covers a lot of aspects in one's life. Top 2 would be career and lovelife. Let's just say, in my case, my dear friend and I had fun dialoguing last weekend.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Friday, August 03, 2007
Selective speed reader
(written on 30 July 2007)
I was able to finish 2 Erma Bombeck books over the past 4 days. My dear friend exclaimed that I am a speed reader. I explained that I read fast when I am reading something that interests me. I don’t expect to finish a 10 chapter novel on a cowboy’s life or a 2 page essay on how stock markets work. It doesn’t interest me. Rowling is a great writer. That’s what her many readers say. She’s already a millionaire and I think that is proof enough. I haven’t read any of her books or Lord of the Rings or Stephen King’s books. They don’t interest me. Classics like Shakespeare’s novels or even some of the famous children’s literary like Charlotte’s Web. Haven’t read them. I have said before that I am amazed on how some people I know and don’t know write so eloquently. And I believe their selection of reading material has greatly contributed to their style of writing. Pardon me…their great style of writing. But I honestly don’t want to force myself to read their selection of books because I want to write well. I want to read what interests me. And what interests me are works of people like Erma Bombeck and Robert Fulghum. What they write is what is true and real. Their stories don’t have wizards with magic spells but they have parents armed with skills in raising kids. Their stories have kids talking tomatoes not tomatoes talking to kids. I relate to their stories. Stories of childhood, maturity, hope, sadness, love. All these told without any pretense. The story as it is with a bonus of finding humor in it. For me, there is no better story to write about than what life is really about. I am so sure a lot of us have a couple of stories that we would want to share to the rest of the world to learn from or be inspired with. I know I have quite a few.
I could imagine that when Erma after reading one of her first few articles to her husband Bill, Bill exclaimed “You’re really a speed writer.” Nope, she just writes fast when what she’s writing interests her.
I was able to finish 2 Erma Bombeck books over the past 4 days. My dear friend exclaimed that I am a speed reader. I explained that I read fast when I am reading something that interests me. I don’t expect to finish a 10 chapter novel on a cowboy’s life or a 2 page essay on how stock markets work. It doesn’t interest me. Rowling is a great writer. That’s what her many readers say. She’s already a millionaire and I think that is proof enough. I haven’t read any of her books or Lord of the Rings or Stephen King’s books. They don’t interest me. Classics like Shakespeare’s novels or even some of the famous children’s literary like Charlotte’s Web. Haven’t read them. I have said before that I am amazed on how some people I know and don’t know write so eloquently. And I believe their selection of reading material has greatly contributed to their style of writing. Pardon me…their great style of writing. But I honestly don’t want to force myself to read their selection of books because I want to write well. I want to read what interests me. And what interests me are works of people like Erma Bombeck and Robert Fulghum. What they write is what is true and real. Their stories don’t have wizards with magic spells but they have parents armed with skills in raising kids. Their stories have kids talking tomatoes not tomatoes talking to kids. I relate to their stories. Stories of childhood, maturity, hope, sadness, love. All these told without any pretense. The story as it is with a bonus of finding humor in it. For me, there is no better story to write about than what life is really about. I am so sure a lot of us have a couple of stories that we would want to share to the rest of the world to learn from or be inspired with. I know I have quite a few.
I could imagine that when Erma after reading one of her first few articles to her husband Bill, Bill exclaimed “You’re really a speed writer.” Nope, she just writes fast when what she’s writing interests her.
How the german goes well with the sun
(written on 30 July 2007)
I would have panicked with the thought of being locked in my room for 4 days. To have no physical contact (most of the time) with any human for more than a day would make you go berserk. But did I go on a temper tantrum when the doctor said I should be in isolation? I didn’t. Well, first of all, I should be responsible enough not to infect the people who have not been vaccinated and has not gotten this sickness. I have German measles. However, the factor that’s top on the list on why I was comfortable to staying in my room for 96 hours is because I have a phone with a sun sim. I just loaded a card good for 5 days (which actually goes for 6 days and I’m grateful for that). My dear friend has a sun line, too. So, now that I’m at the tail end of my hibernation, I am thankful to sun for keeping me sane. Moreover, my dear friend and I have, I think, covered most topics in our phone conversations while we are both recuperating. (He’s not sure if he is infected so he also took a sick leave. But that’s another story.) I may not be able to recall all our conversations later on but I’m so sure I cherished all of them during my sick leave. I have spent almost a thousand on antibiotics but for me the best medicine was the hundred pesos load. And every peso was worth it.
I would have panicked with the thought of being locked in my room for 4 days. To have no physical contact (most of the time) with any human for more than a day would make you go berserk. But did I go on a temper tantrum when the doctor said I should be in isolation? I didn’t. Well, first of all, I should be responsible enough not to infect the people who have not been vaccinated and has not gotten this sickness. I have German measles. However, the factor that’s top on the list on why I was comfortable to staying in my room for 96 hours is because I have a phone with a sun sim. I just loaded a card good for 5 days (which actually goes for 6 days and I’m grateful for that). My dear friend has a sun line, too. So, now that I’m at the tail end of my hibernation, I am thankful to sun for keeping me sane. Moreover, my dear friend and I have, I think, covered most topics in our phone conversations while we are both recuperating. (He’s not sure if he is infected so he also took a sick leave. But that’s another story.) I may not be able to recall all our conversations later on but I’m so sure I cherished all of them during my sick leave. I have spent almost a thousand on antibiotics but for me the best medicine was the hundred pesos load. And every peso was worth it.
What would Erma say?
(written on 30 July 2007)
Last night, I found myself crying over cellphone messages of almost 2 years ago. I was actually reliving it. It takes talent to live the moment but what I have is the knack of living moments past. To actually feel the emotion I felt at that time. I would cry if I did cry 2 years ago. I would really get down to recalling the weather at that time, what I was wearing and whatever small details I need to be really in that moment. And last night, I was on a roll, my creative juices were overflowing. I even set the mood by putting on reflective music. I could have auditioned for the part and would have gotten it. What was scary about this reliving role playing was I felt so sad that I had to call up my dear friend. I had to tell him that I don’t want that moment to happen to me again. He told me to erase the messages. And he dared ask, hypothetically, “What would Erma say?” Oh, no! I know what Mrs. B would say. She would ask permission to use me as an example in one of her articles of how women are emotional. But in the same article she would say that being emotional also makes us endearing. Of course she would write this with so much eloquence.
This morning I just finished reading “Forever, Erma”, a collection of the best of the best of Erma Bombeck’s articles. (In my opinion all her articles are the best of the best.) When I was reading the Tributes, I found myself crying. (Well, it’s not as if I didn't cry reading most of her articles.) You could see how great a humorist she was by the amount of sadness people felt when she passed away. I never got to meet Erma but how I wish I could have at least written her to say how much inspiration she has given me. I may not be an American nor a housewife but her stories and how she writes them really strikes a cord in my heart and in my life. Each story seems to reflect some story of your life that is too good not to be written about. And here was a person who’s actually reliving it for you, writing it down and many readers relating to it.
And so, I cry tears, both tears of joy and tears of happiness. What would Erma say to the fact that I cry when I feel like crying? I’m pretty sure she would say that she’s proud of me.
Last night, I found myself crying over cellphone messages of almost 2 years ago. I was actually reliving it. It takes talent to live the moment but what I have is the knack of living moments past. To actually feel the emotion I felt at that time. I would cry if I did cry 2 years ago. I would really get down to recalling the weather at that time, what I was wearing and whatever small details I need to be really in that moment. And last night, I was on a roll, my creative juices were overflowing. I even set the mood by putting on reflective music. I could have auditioned for the part and would have gotten it. What was scary about this reliving role playing was I felt so sad that I had to call up my dear friend. I had to tell him that I don’t want that moment to happen to me again. He told me to erase the messages. And he dared ask, hypothetically, “What would Erma say?” Oh, no! I know what Mrs. B would say. She would ask permission to use me as an example in one of her articles of how women are emotional. But in the same article she would say that being emotional also makes us endearing. Of course she would write this with so much eloquence.
This morning I just finished reading “Forever, Erma”, a collection of the best of the best of Erma Bombeck’s articles. (In my opinion all her articles are the best of the best.) When I was reading the Tributes, I found myself crying. (Well, it’s not as if I didn't cry reading most of her articles.) You could see how great a humorist she was by the amount of sadness people felt when she passed away. I never got to meet Erma but how I wish I could have at least written her to say how much inspiration she has given me. I may not be an American nor a housewife but her stories and how she writes them really strikes a cord in my heart and in my life. Each story seems to reflect some story of your life that is too good not to be written about. And here was a person who’s actually reliving it for you, writing it down and many readers relating to it.
And so, I cry tears, both tears of joy and tears of happiness. What would Erma say to the fact that I cry when I feel like crying? I’m pretty sure she would say that she’s proud of me.
Viewing my glass
(written on 29 July 2007)
Since being locked up in my room for almost 3 days, I can’t help but think. Not the ordinary what-can-I-today think but more of what’s-been-happening-to-my-life think. I believe I’m one of the luckiest people in the world to have a dear friend whom I have a very dear relationship. It might not be where I want it to be right now but like what someone told me, as long as we are happy together then that’s okay. Is it? I was typing my dear friend’s text messages. This is something we both do. The messages I needed to type date back to a year ago. So, here I was typing away and realizing how far we’ve gone since 12 months ago. The content of his messages weren’t as sweet then. And it made me think about how I was feeling about the whole situation at that time. I still stuck it out with him. You have to give me credit for that. I, actually, stuck out with him. And this is despite other factors in our separate lives at that time. My dear friend would always talk about seeing glasses half full and Lord knows I’ve been trying to do that in my life. If you must know, my life is full of half filled stuff. But with regards to my relationship with my dear friend, I know it can be more than half-filled. Call me a pessimist but I see the empty half of the glass. I focus on that and I get frustrated. I know we can have something better than what we have right now. He loves me and I love him. He knows that and I know that. Who else knows that? That fact alone is the empty half of the glass.
However, I have moments that I am very positive about our future. It is usually during times when we would pester each other, laugh together or joke each other. I savor those moments and I think he does, too.
So, is it possible to have a glass filled to the brim? Give me credit because I believe it is.
Since being locked up in my room for almost 3 days, I can’t help but think. Not the ordinary what-can-I-today think but more of what’s-been-happening-to-my-life think. I believe I’m one of the luckiest people in the world to have a dear friend whom I have a very dear relationship. It might not be where I want it to be right now but like what someone told me, as long as we are happy together then that’s okay. Is it? I was typing my dear friend’s text messages. This is something we both do. The messages I needed to type date back to a year ago. So, here I was typing away and realizing how far we’ve gone since 12 months ago. The content of his messages weren’t as sweet then. And it made me think about how I was feeling about the whole situation at that time. I still stuck it out with him. You have to give me credit for that. I, actually, stuck out with him. And this is despite other factors in our separate lives at that time. My dear friend would always talk about seeing glasses half full and Lord knows I’ve been trying to do that in my life. If you must know, my life is full of half filled stuff. But with regards to my relationship with my dear friend, I know it can be more than half-filled. Call me a pessimist but I see the empty half of the glass. I focus on that and I get frustrated. I know we can have something better than what we have right now. He loves me and I love him. He knows that and I know that. Who else knows that? That fact alone is the empty half of the glass.
However, I have moments that I am very positive about our future. It is usually during times when we would pester each other, laugh together or joke each other. I savor those moments and I think he does, too.
So, is it possible to have a glass filled to the brim? Give me credit because I believe it is.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
