Viewing my glass

(written on 29 July 2007)

Since being locked up in my room for almost 3 days, I can’t help but think. Not the ordinary what-can-I-today think but more of what’s-been-happening-to-my-life think. I believe I’m one of the luckiest people in the world to have a dear friend whom I have a very dear relationship. It might not be where I want it to be right now but like what someone told me, as long as we are happy together then that’s okay. Is it? I was typing my dear friend’s text messages. This is something we both do. The messages I needed to type date back to a year ago. So, here I was typing away and realizing how far we’ve gone since 12 months ago. The content of his messages weren’t as sweet then. And it made me think about how I was feeling about the whole situation at that time. I still stuck it out with him. You have to give me credit for that. I, actually, stuck out with him. And this is despite other factors in our separate lives at that time. My dear friend would always talk about seeing glasses half full and Lord knows I’ve been trying to do that in my life. If you must know, my life is full of half filled stuff. But with regards to my relationship with my dear friend, I know it can be more than half-filled. Call me a pessimist but I see the empty half of the glass. I focus on that and I get frustrated. I know we can have something better than what we have right now. He loves me and I love him. He knows that and I know that. Who else knows that? That fact alone is the empty half of the glass.

However, I have moments that I am very positive about our future. It is usually during times when we would pester each other, laugh together or joke each other. I savor those moments and I think he does, too.

So, is it possible to have a glass filled to the brim? Give me credit because I believe it is.